Before you rebuke me the Name of Jesus, hear me out! Not too long ago I had to ask myself this very question and answer it with raw truth. How many of us have been praying for months, years, or even decades and still cannot see the desire of our hearts or a promise from God fulfilled? I’m sure you thought you would see a mighty move by now, but you haven’t. How many of us have walked away from the faith, because the very thing we prayed and fasted about did not come to pass? How many of us thought a door opened, only for it to be closed and never open again? How many of us have been delivered, set free, praying, fasting and worshipping, and still, nothing? How many of us are tired of the cycle of misery and disappointment? How many of us have now gotten to the point where we cannot receive a word of encouragement anymore because our hearts have gone so cold, impenetrable? How many of us deep down in the core of our soul are offended, whether we see people blessed with their answered prayers Or someone who seem to give God so much less receive what we perceive as abundance? How many of us can truly say God, I am angry with you, of course, if that is the truth. If you have never felt any of the above then this post may not be for you, but it’s for those who can identify with any or all of the above.
Friends, I have been there, but I just want to share something with you, something very simple that took a load off. One night as I prayed, which honestly at the time was a struggle, a deep struggle, I couldn’t bring myself to babble any more words off the top of my lips, I just burst out, “God I am angry with you, so angry, I feel as if I am in a one sided tumultuous relationship, I feel alone, forgotten and down trodded, I do not care about principalities and powers, all You have to do is speak and they are done, I don’t care if the answers are caught up in heavenlies, You can send Michael to release that, I feel stupid to openly share You, only to receive this”. Please don’t judge me, I have been in a wilderness season for years and at that point to be quite honest, I had gotten weary, tired and truly about to give up. My ‘dry’ season has not changed yet, which is why I chose to write this post now, rather than wait until I get to the other side.
This blog post only serves to help you know you are not alone, and the good news is you are exactly where your Father in Heaven wants you to be. Completely, utterly and fully dependent on Him, and only Him, to bring you out. Unfortunately, it is at this point many of our brothers and sisters walk away from their faith. Some people can easily say it’s because they were weak, or just wanted God for what He could give them, but that is not entirely true. Some of our brothers and sisters were never equipped by their places or worship and leaders to fight warfare the correct way. Just recently, I read a book called Victory in Spiritual Warfare by Dr Tony Evans, in the book, Dr. Evans pointed out that our spiritual armour; the helmet of salvation, breastplate of righteousness, shield of faith, belt of truth and the shoes of the gospel of peace are weapons we use on offensive side, that means in layman’s terms, we use them daily and not just when warfare comes. The spiritual armour entails only one defensive weapon and that is the sword of the spirit, which is the word of God and that we use especially when the enemy comes with his schemes. When Jesus was led out of the wilderness to be tempted, what did He say when temptor spoke, “it is written…….”. The truth is we cannot use our sword if we do not sharpen it daily. We must be in the word to fight the enemies lies and schemes.
If you are going through a season such as this I implore you, be honest with our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ! Let it all out, I promise you, He doesn’t get ruffled, He actually enjoys this part of you because it is at this point, He knows you see Him is your friend. God is a jealous God and these intimate feelings He wants you to share with Him, and sometimes only Him. Secondly, surround yourself with an army of believers who can walk with you through, not to a point, but through. These are people who will be there through the tears and the jumps for joy. Thirdly, learn to encourage yourself, one of the things I do is I listen to words from a few Christian YouTubers (please use discernment in this one), or watch a sermon on YouTube (please also use discernment and stay away from prosperity gospel, listen words from God anchored in sound theology and truth). Finally, do not give up, you would not be in this process if you weren’t trusted by God. Let’s not grow weary in doing good, because in DUE SEASON we WILL REAP THE HARVEST IF WE DO NOT FAINT. Blessings to you my friends in Christ. Until next time…